The Red Box: Misunderstandings and Stereotypes about North Koreans
For North Korean refugees, resettling in a new society comes with many challenges. One of these challenges is overcoming the stereotypes about North Korea and the North Korean people.
In the latest episode of The Red Box, our North Korean friends and 2019 LiNK Advocacy Fellows talk about the struggle of of facing stereotypes after resettling in South Korea.
Watch as Jeongyol, Joy, Dasom, and Ilhyeok answer your questions in The Red Box Series!
Read the transcript of this episode below!
All: Welcome to the Red Box!
Jeongyol:
Are there any misunderstandings about the North Korean people that make you feel uncomfortable?
Ilhyeok: Misunderstandings?
Joy: When I first came to South Korea, was working part-time at a convenience store. I was still very young and had a very heavy North Korean accent.
In South Korea, when a customer enters the part-time employees don't really greet them. But I used to greet the customers standing and say "Welcome!" so people would ask me where I'm from.
I'd tell them that I'm from North Korea. They'd say "oh really?" After they get their stuff and put them on the counter, they'd asked me if I ever had jjajangmyun or pork in North Korea? They'd ask me these types of questions. Some people ask because they don't know but sometimes they ask questions that insinuate that we were all so poor in North Korea. Not everyone in North Korea is like that. There's people who live well too
Jeongyol: If someone asked me that, I’d tell them I might've lived a wealthier life there [in North Korea].
Joy: So those types of questions made me feel a little uncomfortable.
Jeongyol: A lot of people think like that.
Dasom: People think that all North Koreans are poor, ignorant, and uneducated. People have told me that even though I must have starved and lived poorly in North Korea, I don't look the part.
Maybe some people did or didn't have enough food to eat. There are poor people and there are rich people too. Every country is the same — it’s the same in South Korea too. There are rich, poor, and homeless people in South Korea too. I don't think it's right to judge someone like that. It made me feel very uncomfortable
Jeongyol: When I was in high school, there was a soccer match between North Korea and South Korea. But all of a sudden they asked me which team I'm cheering for. So I was startled by the question.
Should I say I'm cheering for North Korea or South Korea? What's my identity?
Even though I'm living in South Korea as a South Korean citizen, they didn't recognize the fact that I'm also South Korean. That we were the same people.
So at the time I answered, "I'm not cheering for either team. I don't care who wins. I’m just watching the game for fun.” It went over smoothly but afterward I kept thinking about it. But now that I think about it…It wasn't my choice to be born in North Korea.
Dasom: Right
Jeongyol: I could've been born in the U.S. but somehow I was born in North Korea.
Anyone could've been born in North Korea.
It's not anyone's fault. So from that moment on, I became confident. I am just who I am.
Ilhyeok: I have this older friend from China. During holidays like in January, he'd always ask me if I am visiting my hometown. Whenever he asks me that question, I want to be able to tell him that I'm am going [home] but I can't because I can't go back so I just don’t answer him. When he asked me if I'm going home, I just wished that I could return home one day.
It's heartbreaking not being able to go home.
During Chuseok and New Year's Day, those two holidays are when I miss home the most.
Joy: One uncomfortable question for me was when I was in school or met people was when they asked me why there's no riot or uprising in North Korea. Sometimes people ask because they really don't know but sometimes they insinuate that we're cowards.
And with that viewpoint, they ask why we won't revolt against the government. I try to explain but they still insist and say, ”But you guys still should have done something.” That makes me a little sad.
In North Korea, there's a system of monitoring each other. So if one person says something bad, they'd get reported right away and taken.
Jeongyol: In South Korea there were a lot of civil riots so they ask why we didn't do anything in North Korea.
Joy: But it's a very different situation.
Jeongyol: The system doesn't allow it.
Dasom:
What also made me uncomfortable was if I did something wrong, people would blame it because I'm North Korean.
They say things like, “It's because she's North Korean.” That made me upset. Other people say bad things and make mistakes too. But because of one mistake they say all North Koreans are like that and that I wouldn't know things or be able to do things because I'm from North Korea.
I hated hearing that so I wouldn't tell anyone that I was from North Korea.
Love Prevails—Three North Korean Love Stories
As Valentine’s Day gets closer, we’d like to share stories from some of North Korean refugees where love overcame challenges. Some have found love despite all odds, others found love after the hardships and achieving freedom. For many refugees, love was what drove them to risk their lives and kept them going as they resettled.
Minji—An Orphan’s Many Champions
Minji was left on the streets in North Korea at a very young age with no idea what her real name or birthday was. A kind man found her and made the selfless decision to risk his life to sneak her into China so a friend could take care of her. His friend nursed her back to health and the family reached out to LiNK to help Minji make the journey to South Korea. She has shown exponential growth since then, thanks to the care of many compassionate people.
Now in South Korea, Minji is thriving in a loving environment with her new foster parents and siblings who celebrate the progress she makes every day.
Jin Kyung—An Uncommon Cinderella Story
Escaping not just a stepmother but also the day-to-day hardships, Jin Kyung crossed the Tumen River into China where she was sold immediately for no more than 10,000 North Korean won and 2 packs of cigarettes. Later, she was sold a second time, but fortunately, to a kind, loving Chinese man and mother-in-law who helped coordinate her escape to South Korea. After resettlement, she eventually reunited with the man, who is now her husband. When Jin Kyung graduated from alternative school last year, her husband and baby boy came to celebrate the occasion.
It warms Jin Kyung’s heart to see the support of her husband in her career and their happy son.
Jung Hee—A Persistent Sincerity
Despite only a brief encounter with him at a retreat for North Koreans in the U.S., Jung Hee’s husband diligently and sincerely pursued her afterwards. Jung Hee found that she can depend on him during difficult times and he showed his affections after every text. She pretended to be bothered, while looking forward to his daily messages. Fearing he would lose her when he heard that her friends were arranging dates for her, he immediately booked a flight to see her and married her within a month with everyone’s approval.
For the couple, to be able to say “I love you” every morning and night is a blessing. Jung Hee believes that every person differs in the way they express their love, but being considerate and taking the first step to love will return that love tenfold.
