Yoon Ha's Story: Part 2 - Life in China
This is the second part of a three-part story. Read part one about the hardships Yoon Ha experienced growing up in North Korea that led her to escape. Part three follows this part with her experience resettling in South Korea.
The couple who helped me escape into China brought me to a house that same night after we crossed the river. There they told me about my options. They said I could work in a restaurant somewhere in China. However, there would be a high risk that I would be caught by the Chinese police and get sent back to North Korea. I already knew that if you get sent back to North Korea from China, you could be severely punished by the North Korean regime.
They said there was another way, which would be safer; I could "marry" a Chinese man. They told me my Chinese husband would protect me from getting caught by the Chinese police. So it seemed that this was the best choice I could make. I had already come to China and I didn’t want to go back to North Korea. I was prepared to do anything to have a better life, so I told the couple that I would live with a Chinese man.
The next morning the couple took me to a car and we started driving.
In the car, I started getting scared. The only thing I knew was that I was going to live with a Chinese man I had never met, and I was just hoping that my life would somehow get better through the marriage. After driving for a while, we arrived in a small city in China. There I met some Chinese people who turned out to be family members of the man I would marry.
I saw one of them give money to the couple who had brought me there. It was then that I realized that I had been sold.
A part of me still felt I could do anything to have a better life. But it didn’t feel good to be sold like an object. Even to this day, there are so many North Korean women being trafficked like I was. This kind of trafficking is now an industry.
I also felt selfish for leaving my mother and sister without letting them know. I came all this way so that I could have a better life, but I missed them a lot. I didn’t know what would happen next or how the Chinese man would treat me. At that point, I wanted to run away, but it was too late and there was nowhere to go. It was a small town in the country and I didn’t know anything, including the Chinese language.
Without having a proper wedding, I started living with the Chinese man - I don’t even want to call him my husband. It was frustrating not knowing any Chinese. And since I was sold into the marriage, I didn’t love the man. So it was really hard for me to live with him.
Despite all of this, I would eventually have my first daughter with him.
He and his family farmed for a living and were very poor. His family didn’t treat me well. They made me do all sorts of hard work on the farm and they would say bad things about me. Sometimes I even got hit. I wasn’t familiar with the area and couldn’t speak the language very well for the first couple of years. And there was always the danger of getting caught by the Chinese police and sent back to North Korea.
I cried a lot whenever I was by myself. I knew I had to keep enduring it for my daughter but it was so tough.
I started hearing from some people around me that I could live safely and freely if I could make it to South Korea. I didn’t want to leave my daughter, but I couldn’t keep living this life without freedom. So I decided to run away, hoping that I could come back for my daughter later.
I soon discovered that it would cost me a lot of money to find people who could take me to South Korea. I had no money, so I ended up getting sold to another Chinese man in order to survive.
Living with the second Chinese man was even worse than with the first one. I still had to do a lot of hard farming work and he was always watching me. He was suspicious that I was going to try to run away. When he went to work he brought me to his workplace so he could still watch me. And he was not kind to me. Whenever I got sick, he didn’t care.
I felt so unloved and suppressed.
Soon, I was pregnant with my second daughter. All the while, my desire to go to South Korea kept growing. I thought about giving up on my unborn daughter, knowing that I couldn’t be a good mother to her while living like this in China. And I knew it would be even harder for me to leave after I gave birth to the baby. But I didn’t want to leave another child of mine for my own freedom.
After hearing from some people that I could raise my child with support from the government in South Korea, I started having hope. I dreamt about living there with my baby. So I looked for opportunities to run away from the second Chinese man, even though he was always watching me. At some point, I met another North Korean woman who lived in my town and who had also been sold into a marriage. She said she could connect me to people in a different city who could help me go to South Korea.
When I was eight months pregnant and my stomach was so big, the Chinese man didn’t watch me as much as he had before. Maybe he thought my body was too heavy to run away. So one day I left home, telling him that I was going to my friend’s house. But actually, I was going to another city to meet people who would connect me to LiNK’s network.
When I was about to leave the town, however, I got caught by the Chinese man. He made me sit behind him on his motorcycle and was taking me back to his house. Riding on the back of the motorcycle, my hat got blown off my head by the wind. I asked him to stop so I could pick it up. It was my favorite hat. He said, “No, we aren’t going to stop. Forget about the hat.”
At that moment, my whole heart and body were telling me, “Do not give up on what you deserve. You deserve to have a simple hat and you deserve to live in freedom like a human being.”
I don’t know how I did it but I jumped off the motorcycle while it was moving. Luckily he wasn’t going too fast and I landed on my back so the baby didn’t get hurt, and I was okay other than scratching my forehead while rolling on the ground.
I got up and started walking toward where the hat fell. The man asked me where I was going and I told him that I was going to get my hat. His motorcycle had lost balance and fallen after I jumped. He didn’t even ask how I was as he started to inspect it for damage. I realized this was my opportunity to run away again. So I grabbed my hat and started running up into the nearby mountains.
I kept going up and up until I was near the top where I could see the road, the man, and his motorcycle. I hid there for a few hours, scared of getting caught by him again. I actually saw him driving around to find me. So I climbed further up and over the other side of the mountain.
Being eight months pregnant, my body was very heavy. But I had to keep moving to get away from the man. I made it over the mountain.
I started heading to the city by taking different vehicles. One time I got on a truck that was transporting dogs. Since all the space was taken by the dogs, I had to sit on one of the guys’ laps in the front seat.
Finally, after some long bus rides that made me feel sick, I connected with LiNK’s network.
Continue reading with Part 3.
A Day at Work with Ji Min and Hyun Kyung
Ji Min and Hyun Kyung recently started working at a food wrapping/delivery company that employs resettled North Koreans. The company buys organic potatoes, fruits, and vegetables from local farmers, and then wraps and delivers them to middle and high school cafeterias.
Ji Min and Hyun Kyung gave our resettlement coordinator Jihyun a tour of their workplace. Though it was their day off, they showed him how they would usually work so the photographer could take photos.
Jihyun: Thanks so much for showing us your workplace and demonstrating how you would usually work.
Ji Min: My pleasure. You know, I am usually not a big fan of getting my picture taken, especially since my family is still in North Korea. However, I am so happy to do this. If my story and pictures can help bring more attention to the North Korean issue so that LiNK will get more support and more North Korean people can achieve freedom through LiNK’s work, I feel like this is something I ought to do. You know, I always want to give back in return for what I have received. LiNK and LiNK’s supporters rescued me when I was in such a dangerous situation in China. I want more North Korean people to benefit from LiNK’s work.
Jihyun: What is the best thing that happened to you recently?
Ji Min: When it snowed for the first time this winter, I felt happy because snow reminds me of my hometown in North Korea. We get a lot of snow in North Korea compared to South Korea.
Recently, I got complimented by my boss for doing something well. You know, since I started working here, I have made some mistakes especially because I didn’t know some vegetables like parsley and broccoli. I had never seen them or heard of them until I started working here, so I got a bit discouraged during the first few weeks. And then, when no one else noticed that some expensive fruit was just sitting outside because someone forgot to put it onto a truck, I spotted the fruit on the ground and told my boss about it so we could save the fruit. If I hadn’t seen it, it would’ve been just thrown away or something. Yes, after all the mistakes I made, I did this so I got a compliment from my boss. It was so encouraging. You know what? No matter how old you are, getting a compliment is still very good (laughs).
Jihyun: What was your biggest challenge in North Korea?
Ji Min: Besides not having enough food and clothes, I really didn’t like that human rights and freedom of speech didn’t exist in North Korea. I could just get by with not having enough food and clothes, but I couldn’t stand my rights and freedom being taken away by the North Korean regime.
Hyun Kyung: I didn’t like the brutality of the North Korean regime. They cruelly punished people who said a single word against the regime. It was so scary.
Jihyun: What's your biggest challenge in South Korea?
Ji Min: I know that not every South Korean person is like this, but there are some South Korean people who have negative stereotypes and prejudices about people from North Korea like me. They sometimes treat me and other North Koreans like second-class citizens, looking down on us. I get very discouraged when that happens to me or other North Koreans.
Hyun Kyung: I am always concerned about my children left in North Korea. It is very difficult to call them, even through brokers, these days. I would never want to think anything about North Korea if my children were with me in South Korea. It is very painful not being with them and not being able to hear their voices on the phone. When I get so sad because of my children, I try to not think about them by working hard. Fortunately, I like what I do at my workplace, so it helps.
Ji Min: I miss my family too. After I came to South Korea, I realized how happy it was just to be with my family looking at their faces whether or not we had enough food or clothes back in North Korea.
Hyun Kyung: Whenever I am having a hard time in South Korea, I tell myself that I shouldn't give up for my children. I must successfully resettle in South Korea, so I can bring them here as soon as possible.
Jihyun: What is it like living in freedom in South Korea?
Hyun Kyung: I am just so thankful for many things. I love the work I do here because it perfectly complements my personality and the way I work (smiling). Among all kinds of new freedoms I have now, I really appreciate the freedom of movement. I like that the public transportation system in South Korea is so good that I can easily go wherever I want.
Ji Min: It is like going from an extreme to the other extreme. My life has radically changed since I came to South Korea. Now, I have freedom and rights I can enjoy.
A funny thing is that back in North Korea even the North Korean constitution states that the North Korean people have freedom and rights, but in real life there is no freedom and rights in the country.
Jihyun: What is something that you started to do in South Korea that you never did before?
Ji Min: I never even dreamed of driving a car in North Korea and after I came to South Korea I got a driver’s license. It feels so good whenever I get to drive a company truck. I always ask myself, “If I was still in North Korea, would I ever be able to drive?”
Jihyun: What should people do in order to remove the stereotypes/prejudices toward North Koreans?
Ji Min: There should be more proper education about North Korea in schools in South Korea. Especially younger South Korean people don’t know about North Korea and North Korean people. I think that is because students in South Korea don’t learn about North Korea and the people properly. Also the students need to know how to differentiate the North Korean regime and the people.
The lack of education on North Korea causes a lot of misunderstanding and indifference toward the North Korean issue and the people. I know that some South Koreans don’t even welcome resettled North Koreans here like me. This is very concerning. I think many South Koreans see reunification and the North Korean issue only as economic issues. They think that reunifying with North Korea and having more resettled North Korean refugees in South Korea won’t be beneficial for them.
Jihyun: What advice would you give to a friend who just arrived in South Korea?
Ji Min: You might get overwhelmed by so many new things and different kinds of jobs you can choose from in South Korea. Try to evaluate yourself (things like your experience, abilities and family situation) from an objective perspective and then choose what you want to do. If you start working, try to work at job as long as possible. Don’t quit your job too quickly.
Hyun Kyung: Yes, I agree! Don’t change jobs too often.
Jihyun: What are your hopes for the new year?
Hyun Kyung: Reunification! Or at least opening up of the North Korean society so I can see my children. I believe if the society opens up, the living conditions of the people in the country will get better.
Ji Min: Realistically, I hope I can work at my current company as long as possible without too much trouble. I hope both me and my company will do well next year.
And…yes, I hope I can see my children somehow. I really want to see them. I really do.
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